Saturday, 6th of March 2010 at 01:45:18 PM 
In our infinite—okay, nearly infinite—collective wisdom, we here at Five Full Plates have decided that as part of our endeavor we should do a weekly check-in to see where we’re all at, and what we’ve learned in the past week.
Mir is our poster child for winning. She says, “I am down another .7 pound, for a total of 9.5 lost. This week I learned that sometimes an asthma attack is your body’s way of saying GET OFF THE ELLIPTICAL, BITCH.” If she can do half a pound THIS WEEK, she wins the freakin’ challenge. WHICH THANK GOD because a 100% failure rate would make me depressed, and as it stands, she may well be tasting the sweet low-cal high protein gluten free fruits of Victory alone, ALAS!
Kira says, “My update for the week is that I am up half a pound, bringing my total loss to 6 and a half pounds. Of course, that makes sense, because I have been weight lifting like a crazy woman, and we all know that muscle weighs more than…hope. This week I learned that it’s best to remain distant but cordial with your muscles, because otherwise they will hurt you. And you still won’t lose weight. Bastard muscles.”
Gray says, “The last couple of days, my scale has only said LOW when I stood upon it, This means that I have lost so much weight that my scale can hardly bear to tell me. RIGHT? I know I MUST have gained back the weight I’ve lost. I can barely move due to my ruined extremities and I am eating the world. My Stelara is scheduled to arrive at the doctor’s office sometime on Tuesday. They promised to call me the minute it arrives so I can run down there and get the injection. This week I learned that the best laid schemes of the fat girl gang aft agley. I am going to secretly do a ten-week challenge for myself when I can walk again.”
Lydia says, “My update is that I lost the two pounds that I gained by going off gluten and dairy. And this week I’m going off potatoes, still restricting dairy and gluten as much as possible.” This week she learned this clever drink recipe, which is gluten, dairy, and potato free. It is called a Fruity Screw and you put these things in a glass: a few grapes, red wine, sprite, lemon sorbet. Then you drink it. The red wine should come in a bottle with a screw top or you have to call it a Fruity CORK and no one wants to drink that. I feel I need SEVERAL of them, right now, because…
I gained JUST a butt ton of weight this week. As I have mentioned in passing, I am having some non-life threatening and excruciatingly boring medical problems which will be resolved with a minor surgical procedure at the end of March. Until then, alas, the temporary solution is to get shots. In my butt. Like a toddler. If that wasn’t humiliating ENOUGH (and it is, I think) one of the side effects of the shot is…wait for it…wait for it…weight gain. Yeah. So shots in the butt and abject failure, two great tastes that taste GREAT together, JUST like a Reesey Cup. If Satan made it. Out of dog poop and peat moss. I had a shot this week and promptly swole up like the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man. So. I am currently 3.8 pounds down from my starting weight, putting me EXACTLY where I was at the end of week one. By NEXT Saturday, I hope to have come full circle, and actually BE at my starting weight so I can pretend this never happened and start over. *weak smile*
But we won’t be starting over JUST YET. We are working here to become better-stronger-faster-smarter-nicer, to not let the inherent BUSINESS of the way we live eat everything up and let us neglect the basics of health and home and happiness.
This closet clearly belongs to a naked Robot.
How did YOU do this week? Are you ready to take the focus off your raging body dysmorphia and put it into unearthing whatever ungodly hell you have stuffed under your sink? Or are you progressing with such vigorous beauty that you intend to lose another five pounds while finally sorting the nine boxes of loose family pictures into albums, bringing home the bacon, frying it up in a pan, spending quality time with your children and still having a sex life?
I think the spring cleaning will be better because:
1. You don’t have to spring clean every living second of the week.
2. If you do clean your closet you end with a clean closet, whereas if you diet and exercise you have to then spin the wheel of mystery which sometimes results in gains.
3. We can eat while cleaning.
However I’m a bit concerned that I’ll just do nothing and then whine. Or that I’ll secretly hire someone to do it for me and then post completely fraudulent pictures. Or that something dead is in my closet. OH DEAR.
I plan to include before and after pics for much hilarity. My bedroom…no one would think that any living creature should sleep in there.
well, this week I lost absolutely nothing, so I’m still 10.75 pounds down. To be more precise, this week I gained a pound and then lost it again. What I learned: victory is bad for my moral fibre.
Did you have to pick getting organised for the next challenge?? I hate cleaning!
I think its awesome that you are all sticking to it, despite the ups and downs!
I’m down 1.2 pounds, putting me at 9.2 pounds total. I may actually make it! I’m debating the diet vs lifestyle question now, since I only have a few pounds to go before I’m at my ideal weight.
I have definitely had my ups and downs, coming out of the gate with a ridiculous 7 pound loss in about 2 weeks. Then my weight went up, then down, then up again, BUT I am currently sitting at an 11.0 pound loss, and I don’t do my official weigh-in until Monday. HOWEVER, I am about to head out the door (sans kids) to a Birthday dinner with my husband for a friend of ours at a Mexican Restaurant that I hear is great (Vivo in Austin, for all you Texans). I am following a low-carb/South Beachy diet, but corn chips are my own personal Kryptonite (I couldn’t care less about chocolate or sweets, but chips, potatoes, and salty carbs just KILL ME), I suspect I’m going to gain a few pounds tonight alone.
Not only is that a naked robot that owns that closet, it’s obviously a GUY naked robot… there are NO SHOES in that picture!
I’m proud of all of you for working at this challenge, whether you “succeed” by losing 10 lbs in 10 weeks or not, you’ve all made real progress in thinking about what you need to do to be healthier and happier.
And THAT’S a win worth celebrating!
I finally had some success, and while I was hoping for 5 lbs during this challenge, I just made 6 a minute ago!!! The scale might have lied. I’ll check again soon. From four to six without passing five is dubious, no?
Never did manage to get my act together to join you in the weight challenge. But we’re moving in July so I will absolutely join you in the spring cleaning challenge. “Lose it or move it” is my motto. Either that or “Burn it all and start fresh!”
The sun come out today and exposed the dust that is my house. OK, so maybe it isn’t quite that bad, but still, maybe this spring cleaning challenge is a good idea.
I am so in on the cleaning challenge. I’m ok with my body, but I suffer from MAJOR housekeeping dysphoria. I’m always afraid that guests will focus in on the stray Alpha-Bit lurking under the table or the water splotches on the bathroom mirror and will judge me as filthy and despicable. If I could just conquer the piles of paper on my desk, I’d totally feel like a better person.
I’m glad to hear that FFP is not a one-time, 10-week deal since I’ve had such fun reading along with you ladies. I look forward to the spring cleaning challenge (which I could use just as much help with as the weight loss challenge but am much more likely to participate in since I can take part and still eat chocolate chip cookies). Put me down for a “Fly Lady Can Suck It” shirt.
Well, I too am glad you all are going to keep blogging at FFP. I’ll come along for the cleaning challenge but really do hope you’ll go back to a weight loss or fitness challenge again because I definitely feel that following this blog has helped me stay the track in my goal. Thanks for being real… and for being funny!
I don’t know about that last sentence, but I made a Humpty Dumpty costume for an eight-grader yesterday and brought homemade cheesecake to work with me this morning. I hereby declare myself a domestic success!