*tap, tap, tap*
Is this thing on?
Sheesh, y’all. It’s all quiet and dark in here. There are cobwebs and sheets draped over all the furniture…wait a second. I’m getting lost in my own metaphor.
Anyhow, I thought I’d stop by and visit for a while. Do you mind? Well, you might when you hear what I have to say.
I’m here to complain. To whine and bitch and rest my head on your kitchen table in a very unappealing and pitiful manner.
It’s NOT FAIR!
Summer is here, and my local best friend is in England with another friend of ours for THREE WEEKS. Get this – they went WITHOUT CHILDREN. The thought gives me shivers, made of equal parts “how do you go without the BABIES?” and absolute bald, slavering envy. Three weeks in England! Without children!
Mir is on a cruise ship with her family, having a wonderful time, by the sounds of it. Joss is on a book tour for her latest novel, being wonderful, having parties thrown for her spontaneously and committing acts of shopping.
I want to GO SOMEWHERE! I want to HAVE FUN!
Oh, but wait! My son is going to summer camp next month, so I get to drive him there. And go visit him once during the two weeks (I JUST HAVE TO, OKAY?), and then go back to get him. So. That’s three weekends in a row that I’ll get to be in the car for 16 hours or so. *blink. blink blink* Yeah. That’s practically the same thing as a freaking CRUISE.
Oh, but I shouldn’t complain. After all, my life has its own charms, right? Like…all the neighborhood kids are out in force, so I never know who I might find on my front lawn, breaking up a sheet of Styrofoam into teeny, tiny bits. Like snow, but malevolent. And the baby is teething, so I’m intimately acquainted with hours of the night that generally go neglected. I get to shout after children to “CLOSE THE DOOR” a trillion times a day. My middle son is officially moving into adolescence, and has entered that lovely phase where he is so obdurate that I like to walk into the room and say “hey, Max? Up,” just to hear him reply with deep, dripping scorn, “DOWN, Mom. Duh. Everyone knows THAT.”
So what I’m trying to do is focus instead on the joys of summer. I’m thinking of the small things that make this my favorite time of the year, and keeping those in my mind. Here’s what I have so far:
Of course, to make myself some iced coffee, I’d have to remember to cold-brew some coffee the night before, and that seems to be…shall we say…beyond my limited mental capacities. So.
I need your help, people. I need ideas, events, and treats to put the magic back in my summer. What makes you smile when people you love have abandoned you are off enjoying themselves? Please give me your best suggestions. Or, barring that, you could chip in and send me on a cruise. KIDDING.